Walk jokes
Kid walks in the door. "Mommy and Daddy, I'm home." Mommy and Daddy meanwhile in their room moaning. Kid runs to them thinking they're hurt and sees something he definitely shouldn't have.
10 minutes later, [he] kills himself.
Yo mama so fat when she walked all we knew was EARTHQUAKE!
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
An orphan walked up to a baseball field, but a security guard said he couldn't come in because it was a home game.
Memes
Super Relateable
My name is Bishal Khan and I can't walk.
Why are Liverpool not disabled friendly?
They never walk alone.
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.
The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."
When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.
The walking dead.
My sister is so short she can't walk.
My mom once ate a full giant cheesecake, and we were walking to our flight back home, and she had to sh*t.
We were walking to the bathroom, and she full on [did it] in front of the carousel. She had a lump of poo in her pants... True story, haha!
Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."
Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."
To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"
Baby: Stroll?
Me: *puts baby in stroller* WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL!
Baby: *happily screams*
Stroller: *front wheels break off*
Me: WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL WITH NO FRONT WHEELS!
Baby: Oka- CRASH!
One morning I saw three kids were bullying one other kid because they didn't have a dad...
Later that day the three same kids were walking toward an orphanage. :)
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"
A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"
Your mama is so slow, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.