Vs jokes
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?
Pizza won't cut itself.
What's the difference between a bird and a kid on the roof?
The bird can fly off the roof.
What is the difference between emo grass and normal grass?
Emo grass cuts itself.
What's the difference between property and women? At least property still retains some value after getting wrecked.
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner is wanted!
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? Because they ordered pepperoni, yet plane arrived!!!
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth," the woman told her dentist.
He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."
"Sticks and stones break my bones."
A crowbar does it so much quicker.
I respect cancer more than I respect depression.
At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.
What is the difference between a puppy and a fork?
I don’t microwave forks.
What is the difference between a detective company and a man with eyes on his butt?
One has a private eye, and the other has eyed privates.
Q: What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
A: Apples get picked.
Q: What's the difference between a fetus and an onion?
A: One makes you cry when you chop it into pieces.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked.
Why do boys feel safer at Ronald McDonald's House than Neverland Ranch?
Ronald McDonald's doesn't put his meat between boys' buns.
What’s the difference between my mom and the Twin Towers?
My mom got hit by two cars. The Twin Towers got hit by two planes.