I’d like to take you to the movies, but unfortunately, they don’t let you bring your own snacks.
When you're born on 4/20/69...
If I measured your forehead, it would be 100,000,000,000,000,000 miles long.
Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.
If you tried to look at your hairline in a mirror, it would shatter into 100,000,000,000 pieces.
Your forehead and hairline are like friends; they go way back.
@ Kobe the person under my joke, your hairline is so bad that Kobe Bryant could've lived if he landed the helicopter on your forehead.
Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.
Your mom is so fat Thanos had to snap twice.
Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.
You wanna know the difference between a rake and your mom? The rake is actually useful.
Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.
Your hairline is so ugly it looks worse than your mom's.
If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)
Yo mama is so fat your dad could never get away.
The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.
Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.
Why are white people so white?
Because they forgot to urine on lotion.
Your hairline dates so far back like when your dad left.
I would kiss your lips, but your legs are blocking the way.
If you know, you know. 😏😏
Friend: "UR LIT BRO!!"
Me: "That's what my sleeve said to my arm."
