Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.
Space Shuttle Mom
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, buttercup. This joke is about OP's (that's you) momma being so obese that even a space shuttle, like, a real far-away spaceship, can see her. I know you're the kind of guy who microwaves fish in the office so you may need to read it a few times. Also, you're probably on several government watch lists.