Two jokes

Columbine High basketball team will never be good again after they lost their two best shooters.

Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?

A: "Those are two nice towers right there."

What did the two towers make after they died? The One World Trade Center.

My wife is so fat.

She asked me to get on top; I had to get a step ladder. When I got up there, my ears popped, and the air was so thin. I had to have two Sherpas drag me off the mountain.

When I see two lovers' names on a tree, I don’t find it cute or funny. I think, why would they be bringing a knife on a date?

Ur mama so fat she needs two watches because she's in different time zones.

I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.

Two gays are getting ready for Christmas... They are expecting a big package in the mail!

What has 4 legs and two gloves?

All five people on my baseball team. ⚾️

Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."

Two air vents walked into a bar.

The third one ducted.

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie with Batman?

Two family reunions!

How do you ride two bikes at once?

You ride them in tandem!

You can play Jenga in two places now: New York and Miami (Chaplin Towers.) They probably have Jenga tournaments there every year.

I saw an ad that said, "By the time this ad is over, two identities would have been stolen." So, I did what I had to do and skipped the ad! You're welcome to the two people's identities I saved!

Two people wanted pepperoni pizza... Sadly, they got planes.

I got these two people in my class we call them Twin Towers, so when I heard about it I threw a paper airplane at them.

POV: I threw a paper airplane between the two twins, class.

I broke my arm in two places. You know what the doctor told me? Stay out of those places!

Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?

They already lost two towers.