Try jokes
Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.
We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!
An emo tried to give me a high five...
I left him hanging.
I tried to high-five a tree. It left me hanging.
One day my mom told me to take out the trash, and I did. The next day, mom asked me, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "A garbage truck took her." Mom started running to try and get the truck before it left.
Why don’t old people have sex?
When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old?
Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor tried to put her back in.
Yo mama's so gay that, after watching Aladdin, she tried to fly on a pride flag!
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
"Babe, is it in?" "Yeah." "Does it hurt?" "Uh-huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
Your mama is so ugly, she tried summoning Candyman, but he refused to come!
I tried to adopt an orphan. The card got declined harder than the child did.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
What is the most famous dish in Africa?
Don't know, they haven't tried it yet.
People trying to stop me from being depressed: “Just cheer up!”
Me: “WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT!”
What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never try to legislate against?
A school shooting.
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
what's the worst thing to say to an emo?
if you don't succeed the first time, try try try again.