what do sloths and depressed people have in common? ... they both hang from trees.
Tree Jokes
What's big and white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?
The apple... the emo just hangs there.
An e-girl went to go high five a tree, but the tree left her hanging.
Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.
Don’t orphans work at Dollar Tree?
Cause it’s a family business.
What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A stump.
Why is it bad to climb a tree?
You might fall on an orphan! 🫥
I saw a tree. I looked up, and there was an apple hanging. And then I said, "Wow, that guy is lucky!"
What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?
Answer: He was left there hanging.
It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.
Most foresters have a wooden personality.
What do you call a group of black men hanging from a tree?
Alabama wind chimes.
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?
If a woodchuck could chuck wood?
As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
What's the difference between an apple and emos?
They both hang on trees.
Did you hear about Paul Walker's rap?
Wrapped around that tree.
What did Dom Toretto say about the tree Paul Walker hit?
"Family strong, but not that strong."
Your entire family tree must be a cactus, because everyone in your family is such a prick.
What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?
The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.