I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.
The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"
He grabs a noose.
Broccoli says, "I look like a tree."
Walnut says, "I look like a brain."
Cashew says, "I look like a kidney."
Banana says, "Can we change the topic please?"
Rock-a-bye dummy, in the tree top.
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall.
Down will come dummy, cradle and all.
What is black and white and sits in a tree?
A fridge wearing a leather jacket! XD
A treatment joke.
The chicken is actually a fruit because it is grown on a pole-tree.
Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.
Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.
My brother told me he wanted to find a golden apple tree in real life. I told him it was a fruitless mission.
When you're walking through the garden section at Walmart and you hear your grandpa screaming, "They're in the fucking trees!"
What was the oak tree's response to the apple tree's joke?
You should leaf it alone!
How do trees find each other? They log-ate!
When I try to eat, but I hurt my feet. When I using a hoe, but I hurt my toe. When I going to a doctor, but then I get trolled. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I using a copper, but I enveloped by a hopper. When I trying to draw someone, but it ended up with a punishment. When I spit on a bunny, it jumps right on me. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I growing older, someone called me a slacker. When I was 33, I bumped into a tree. When I getting angry, people calls me crazy lady. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
I speak for the trees.
*Trees whisper in my ear*
They said six million wasn't enough.
Q) What do trees call deforestation?
A) TREASON!
What did the wind say to the palm tree? "Hold onto your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job."
I always look at the earth and think, "Ahh, this is TREE-ific!"
What’s the difference between a mushroom and a tree?
One's a fucking tree.
