New Treatment Jokes - Page 2 - Worst Jokes Ever

Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?

Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.

Imagine this scenario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "You have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc." and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.

A midget had a disease, and the cure was on the highest shelf.

Scientists are trying to find a cure for anorexics. It should be a piece of cake!

Women treat me like a god.

They ignore me till they need something.

A few years ago I had a brush with cancer...

All of the bristles fell out!

Doctor: "What's your zodiac sign?"

Patient: "Cancer?"

Doctor: "What a coincidence."

What do you do when a person with epilepsy gets seizures in the bathtub? Throw in some laundry.

A few men have curved penises, but they can fix that problem by straightening it out.

Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?

Doctor: Ten.

Man: Weeks? Months? Days?

Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...

Doctor: You have cancer.

Patient: Will I survive?

Doctor: Probably not.

Have you heard about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

What the difference between me and cancer

My mom did beat cancer

What creature takes the most medicine?

Caterpillar.

"I have cancer," the doctor said. "I have 3 days to live," but I was like "fuck it" and killed him. The jury said, "I have life in prison." I shouted, "Yes!" He said, "Thank you, you saved my life!"

A child with cancer: "I want to be like you when I grow up." Doctor: "Oh, you're not going to grow up."

POV: You accidentally get H in your IV drip.

One time a kid came to the hospital and said, "I really need help." The kid said he was really hot, so they put an ice cold towel on him.

Then the doctor asked him if he had any problems, and he said, "Yes, I am really hot." The doctor realized that he looked fine, so he said, "Are you sure? You look amazing." And the kid said that he meant to say, "I look hot!"