Travel jokes
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.
"Not a bunch, a herd," her friend replied.
"Heard of what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Of course I've heard of cows."
"No, a cow herd."
"What do I care what a cow heard? I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He traveled too far from the outlet.
How did I get to Iraq? I ran.
Two tourists climb a mountain that utters certain doom.
One tourist falls down. The tourist that's still on the mountain says, "You ok down there?"
The other tourist says, "Can't I just rest in peace?!"
None of these jokes really took off.
Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.
Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱
Why can’t you run in a campground?
Because it’s past tents.
Three men were in a desert. One man was holding a jug, the 2nd was holding a paper bag, and the last was holding a car door. A man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug. He said it was his water and if he got thirsty, he would take a drink.
Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag? The guy said this is my packed lunch, so if I get hungry, I will eat my lunch.
Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said if he got hot he would roll down the window.
What is the most dangerous mountain? Kilimanjaro.
What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? About half way.
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
My dad said he'd be back later after he walked out the door with a suitcase.
Who takes a suitcase to the grocery store? Silly daddy!
I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
I followed the sun for a day (stood there at noon). I found myself at the same spot.
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.
I left Iran. Guess how? I ran!
We were talking about ancient ruins last week, so I said they can ruin your day!