Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend called me a "bot" in Fortnite, so I called her "sandwich maker 3000."
If an apple and an emo kid fell out of a tree, which would hit the ground first?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
He's got a massive f*cking cock, Ayew, Ayew. He tucks it in his football sock, Ayew, Ayew. Shagged a bird and now she's dead, Swung his cock around her head, Jordan Ayew Palace number nine.
What do Mexicans cut their pizza with? A Little Caesars.
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
To be wanted.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
Why is Saturn richer than other planets?
It has a ring!
Why did the dwarf get a job at Lidl?
Because every Lidl helps.
I need a hug.
*hugs train*
Drop me in Afghanistan with a cigar, a Kobe jersey, a MAC-10, a Lambo Huracan with a bumper delete, and a Toyota Tacoma with an M249 on the back. Then I'll have Afghanistan as the 51st state by midnight.
What did the Teacher say to the orphan?
"I am calling your parents!"
Why did the orphan fall off the mountain? Because his parents let go.
A kindergarten class is learning about the alphabet. The teacher asked, "What comes after M?"
Little Timmy reached into his backpack and yelled, "16!"
My parents telling me: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
Me upset about my suicide attempt doesn't succeed.
I was walking and I saw a girl crying, and she told me to take her dollhouse and I asked why. She said because I don't have one.
2k14 was so realistic when I switched to Kobe, the pass button stopped working.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He couldn't find home.
Fat people should expect big things when they take their shirt off.