Worst Jokes Ever
Hi! Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been so busy!!!! I miss y'all, though!
Why did the golfer change his pants?
Because he got a hole in one!
What a school shooter's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
What's the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot?
A man will actually look for the golf ball.
"Sharing is communism."
Apple created the iPhone X for orphans because they don't have a home.
Why did the Headless Horseman get a job?
He was trying to get ahead in life.
Did you hear about that musical that was sung by some obsidian?
It rocked!
In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths.
One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post
A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
Isac, I suck deez nuts!
Why did the lonely fish get a detention? Because he left the school.
My wife is pregnant, but when we get to the doctors, something happened...
What happened?
Answer: The husband is pregnant too, with someone else’s baby, not the wife’s baby, but the wife is pregnant with his baby.
Where do you buy cows in bulk?
At the stock market.
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.
Once you’ve seen a shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
Why have there been so many deaths around the world?
Trees and ropes.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
Wanna hear two short jokes and one long one?
joke, joke, jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke.