Worst Jokes Ever
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: Started to laugh and said "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Hehe
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.
Your hairline goes so far back that it had dinner with Jesus.
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
Once you’ve seen a shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
I told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man: Far From Home.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
Why have there been so many deaths around the world?
Trees and ropes.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
Delyla is a bitch.
I'd give you a nasty look, but you've already got one.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair and I screamed, "EXTREME PARKOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Imagine if the kid in a wheelchair was in Fast and Furious. His wheelchair is the only one that keeps him going.
Scientists are trying to find a cure for anorexics. It should be a piece of cake!
Why did he die? He forgot to get a new GPU for his new PC.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
Runner beans.