What sound did Stephen Hawking make when he died? Power off.
Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a gamer and dog poop?
Dog poop touches grass.
Can we go back to 2001?
I bet it was more fun back then.
Here’s one for the Aussies: What’s the difference between an echidna and a police car? All the pricks are on the inside.
Emo girls be like, "How much am I worth?"
Girl, scan the code on your wrist.
I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.
Just ask for a hotspot on September 9, 2001, you'll know.
What do you call a turkey when it is scared?
A chicken.
What hits the ground first, an apple or an emo girl?
The rope would catch her.
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money, and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money.
Bartender says you gotta do 3 tasks. He takes the shot of Jack, and the customer says, "What are the tasks?" He says, "The 1st one is, well the 1st 1 is, I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth, and you gotta pull it." He says, "All right, what's the 2nd 1?" He said, "I got a big old girl upstairs that ain't had no loving in a long time, you gotta make her smile." He takes another shot of Jack. He said, "All right, what's the 3rd 1?" He said, "You see that horse outside, you gotta make him laugh and cry."
Guy goes upstairs, goes out back, comes out to the front, comes back in. The other customer said, "Give him the jar." The guy says, "I took care of that lady's tooth, and I made that alligator smile."
"Well how'd you make the horse laugh?" he said. "Easy, I told him I had a bigger deck then him."
Bartender says, "How did you make him cry?" He said, "Easy, I showed him."
As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks, "What’s the purpose of your visit?"... "I’m going to shoot a pilot" is never a good answer.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball? They always eat the bat.
What is a vegetarian's favorite song?
No beef.
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
A Mario & Luigi joke.
What are the Mario bros' view on child support?
Mario: The parents are obligated to provide for the child and help them the best they could.
Luigi: LMAO I GOTTA GO!
Why did the girl bring the ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school.
Like this post and comment down below if you want me to announce my real name in my next post!
Why can’t orphans play poker?
Because they don’t know what a full house is! 🥵🥵👴😂🔫😈💀💀💀💀💀💀
What did the grape say when the fox stepped on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
