Worst Jokes Ever

Okay, I'm going to be sharing a story that I never shared before... Look in the chat to see the whole story.

Pokemon: Why did the Miltank cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

What is an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy.

Why did the cow go to outer space?

To see the moooon!

What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."

The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.

What is one good thing about pedophiles?

They drive slow in the school zone.

I went to self-checkout at a store and I scanned my products, but the scanner wouldn't scan the barcode on my arm.

Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?

A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.

What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?

You would be dam unlucky.

Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.

My attempt in 2021.

And my attempt this year.

I went to the pharmacy the other day. I tried to buy a pack of condoms, but I pretended I didn't have enough money to mess with the cashier.

I went back into the aisles of the store, got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap, bought them, and walked out. I loved the look on the cashier's face when they saw my decision.

Jokes about communism aren't funny unless everyone gets them.

My wife told me to contact more of my feminine side.

I crashed the car and fucked my trainer.

These jokes are so dark that they picked the cotton!

Russia—the real joke.

My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.

I went to the “lists of women” page on Wikipedia and it was blank.

Either, Wikipedia is proving women do not exist or John Cena decided to come out as transgender.

Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?

What's overcrowded and uncomfortable?

My mind.