Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
What comedy skill can’t any cripple master?
Stand up.
I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.
I have a fish that can breakdance, but only for 20 seconds and only once.
What do you call a girl furry?
A pussy cat.
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
"The naked man fears no pickpocket."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
"If you want to win swiftly, camp the enemies' spawn."
- Sun Tzu
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
The world has turned upside down. Orphans are now being homeschooled.
Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.
I gave a blind kid a gun. I told him it was a hair dryer.
A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...
"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.