Worst Jokes Ever
My BFF asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?"
I said: "Why?"
My BFF says: "Well, it's because he was already cheating!"
I said: "KNEW IT!"
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
Guys, don’t put the Holocaust books in the fiction section, it was the worst mistake of my life!
Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?
'Cause they're dark.
What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?
You would be dam unlucky.
Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?
Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.
Why are astronauts forgetful?
They're always spacing out.
"Sticks and stones break my bones."
A crowbar does it so much quicker.
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.
Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.
Russia—the real joke.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
To be wanted.
Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?
A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.
A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"
She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"
He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
What is the difference between 9/11 and rickrolling?
The Twin Towers gave up and let down.
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"
She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.
He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"
This dad went out hunting, he killed a deer. He came home and he and his wife decided to have it for dinner but not tell their kids. Instead, they made them guess. The dad said, "It's something that daddy calls mommy." The little girl yells to her brother, "Don't eat it! It's an ass!"
Say "crack my finger" backwards.