Worst Jokes Ever
What is a Mexican’s favorite band?
Twenty Juan Pilots.
What does Michael Jackson and a lion have in common?
They're both predators.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
Yo mama is so fat, she has her own personal gravity.
Me: I got kicked out of the library the other day.
Friend: Why?
Me: Because I put the women rights book in the fiction section.
Michael Jackson is pure cheese.
I mean, Jacko comes on a little cracker.
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all. Heck, cheer on the rapist, or join in the fun.
Broke my toenail yesterday. I'm now presenting you puns/jokes:
1. "Yeah, I broke my toenail, wanna see phoTOES?" 2. "I'm tired of bandaging my toe! Oh. My. GAUZE."
Are you electricity? 'Cause I wanna get a bath with you ;)
Why do orphans play GTA? Cause they wanna feel wanted.
Why are orphans good at dodgeball?
They can dodge adoptions.
Roses are red, violets are black, your mum's so fat she sold her son for 10 Big Macs.
My friend threw a soccer ball at a disabled kid.
We all yelled "Rocket league!"
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for a glass of H2O. The second one asks for a glass of H2O, too. The second one dies. Why?
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
What do you call Juice WRLD in a coffin?
A juice box...
Why do orphans not know if they're lactose intolerant?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
So my sister was eating Now&Laters, and I continuously heard smacking sounds. So I told her, "Can you stop smacking? It's annoying." Then she said, "I can't, it's a juicy type of candy." So I said, "I can stop the candies from making that sound." Then she said, "How?" So I smacked her. :)