Worst Jokes Ever
I tried to catch fog today. I mist.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to Hell?
He couldn't get up the stairway to Heaven.
Adolf Hitler + Vladimir Putin = Vladolf Putler.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"
Yo mama so fat, she was pulled over... FOR HAVING 12 POUNDS OF CRACK ON HER!
It's okay, you had socks on :)
rtuiyg.
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.
Once there was a man. A man who had a butt.
Once he was at this job interview and he was going to get the job, but just before the boss was going to hire him, he farted. It was a really bad one. It was 47 minutes long and so loud the windows rattled. When it was over, the man screamed and jumped out the window.
He didn't get the job.
How are rape and an airplane similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
What kind of mask are you wearing?
An Elon Musk!
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈
I entered ten puns in a joke contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did.
One day, a child walks along and asks, "Mother, why am I called Butterfly?"
The mother replies, "A butterfly landed on you as a baby."
A minute later, another child comes along and says, "Mother, why am I called Feather?"
The mother then replied, "Because a feather fell on your head when you were born."
Then Brick comes along and says, "Ahahhsdjsjskxs."
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wipe his ass.
When you get suspended from school for giving the deaf kid AirPods for his birthday.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What is it called when someone is a wheel chair and in a fire?
Answer: Hot wheels...