Worst Jokes Ever
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
What's the best cheese in the world?
Dick cheese.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side.
What did the emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? It stands for family.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
What's Michael Jackson's nickname?
Nivea black and white.
Why did the chiropractor go to jail? For not paying $75 in back taxes.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Hey ummm help!
A guy walks into an AA meeting and asks for a road map.
I was given my electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me 'cause I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up, too.
Did you hear about the baseball game between America and Ethiopia?
America - 8
Ethiopia - didn't.
Hello Watersharky, I am Koge.
I see your songs and want to be your agent. Please write back about this offer. Thank you.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Q. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
A. Because it has a silent pee.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."