Worst Jokes Ever
A normal exorcism is getting a demon out of a person, but a reverse exorcism is the devil telling the priest to get out of the child.
What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
Alien vs. Predator.
A boy sat in his bed, watching a meteor shower. He was a vengeful child and wished that his parents would no longer bother him whilst he was gaming.
The next morning, he woke up to find his mother had passed away in the night. Clearly his wish had worked. However, his father worked a midnight job, and as such the boy was very confused when he returned home from work, expecting him to have met the same fate.
The two of them then looked out the window in thought, only to find the milkman lying dead on the pavement.
Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.
Tell your mom I don't like waiting in queues.
A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?
Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
What's the rarest gun you can find in Africa? A water gun.
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
So I was living with a girl for a few weeks, and it was nice until she found out that I was there.
One day I was walking next to a homeless man, and he was eating grass. I asked him if he was hungry. He said yes. I said, "Follow me." You should have seen his face when I showed him my backyard!
What do you call two natives in a ditch?
A sleepover.
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
Americans: We drive on the right side of the road.
The British: We drive on the left side of the road.
Russia: ROAD IS ROAD. *crashing noises follow*
If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?
Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.
And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
What do you call an orphan that grows to be a priest?
Fatherless.