Worst Jokes Ever

Your mam is gay.

I don't think anyone even checks these jokes.

What did the pedophile say to the kids?

"FUCK!"

My pee pee fell off.

Yourself.

So, I met this girl and she was a 9 out of 10. I met this other girl who was 7 years old. The 7-year-old ate my 9 out of 10 girl because 7 was a psychopath.

So I was making slime, so I put glue, and a lil' pump of lotion and slime activator. Ahah, lil pump, get it?

My dad.

During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.

Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.

My wiener's small.

Question: Why can't you trust a tree?

Answer: 'Cause they are always shady.

The cat said hi.

Have you ever wondered how your teachers would look if they were 20 years younger than they actually are? I bet some of them would be smoking hot. Especially my 25-year-old English teacher. I'd bang her if she were 20 years younger.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends how hard you throw them.

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Because seven eight (ate) nine.

What do you call a three-humped camel?

Pregnant.

If you read this, your life is a joke.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

Someone unplugged the router.

What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?

You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!

What’s Stephen Hawking's favorite song? Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes.