Worst Jokes Ever
I'll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you're now worthless to me!
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
How do you beat Lady Gaga at Texas hold’em?
Poker face.
What's the difference between pepper and salt? One of them is black and the other one is white.
Frenid: R u gay?
Me: Yes u
Frenid: No I am bi.
Me: Dang it!
Frenid: What?
Me: I like u.
Frenid: Ok I like u to.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims – they went 89 stories in ten seconds.
How do you blind an Asian?
Put a windshield in front of them.
Someone on here said it previously:
My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is until my mom took the urn away from me.
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
Mmm, I'm Walter McWhitey, I'm from the newest Mexico.
“The difference between Asians and Caucasians is the cau-”.
Paedophiles are f***ing immature assholes.
Every moon has a silver lining.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him for a drag.
What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A neigh-ga.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
A one-eyed fish, you smart ass!
What do cows like to do?
Cow-culating!
My son.
What is the best thing about 28 year olds? There are 20 of them!
Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.