Worst Jokes Ever
Q: What do you call a rich Asian? A: Dr.
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Well, not if it's poisoned. Then the antidote becomes the most important.
What do you call headphones that walk out on their children? Deadbeats.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
"A satisfactory."
Brings a whole new meaning to brotherly love.
Not a joke, but here's a good workout, I guess:
Sit-ups: 50
Push-ups: 40
Squats: 30
Do 5 sets.
I found the best GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-get-the-time-machine.
Minimalism is a scam created by Big Small to sell more less.
Three drunk guys entered a taxi.
The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he started the engine and turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination." The first guy gave him money, and the second guy said, "Thank you." The third guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked, thinking the third drunk knew what he did. But then he asked, "What was that for?" The third guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
Why did Mozart kill all of his chickens?
When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, "Bach, Bach, Bach!"
Why do so many kids love boomerangs? Because they always come back.
Your dad is so smart, he took one look at you and left.
Why do some kids have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.