Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Because all I do is pound it, man. I would put you on my "600 Pound Life" if you didn't weigh 1,000.

This isn't a joke. My dad went to the shops for some bread 16 years ago. He still hasn't returned. Should I be worried yet? Or should I wait a year?

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing. They just waved.

Did you sea what I did there?

I told my dad to get me a packet of cigarettes, he never came back.

AND I still didn't get my FUCKING CIGARETTES!

[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?

What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?

"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"

What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?

One does not crow when you put it in an oven.