Worst Jokes Ever
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
What's the time?
How would I know?
Dear algebra,
I don't want to find your X. I don't know Y she left you.
I bought my son an Xbox in 2017. It’s now 2018, and I’m still waiting for him to open it.
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?
Bryce: What?
Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!
P.S. I'm a girl.
Your mom's my dad. Think about that!
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
What's a goat's favorite video game?
Mario Goat Cart!
Think like a proton and stay positive!
Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.
What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.
Me: "I came home laughing."
Parents: "What's wrong?"
Me: "The teacher asked everyone a question. Luckily, I was the only one who knew."
Parents: "Good for you, Johnny. What was the fantastic question your teacher gave everyone and only you knew?"
Me: "Well, it's kinda complicated, but here it goes."
Parents: "What is it?"
Me: "Who farted?"
I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!
My ex misses me, good thing she'll never hit me.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you a lot!
It squirted in my eye, God dammit!
What do you call a PEIS?
"You look like Barney, I'm choking you too, and your face is turning all purple and blue!"