Worst Jokes Ever
Hey, fatboy, why are you so damn fat?
Because every time I f*** your mom, she gives me a cookie.
What do you get when you beat up an autistic kid?
Mashed potatoes.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
"SUPPLIES!"
Some say Stephen Hawking couldn't stand up for himself 😂
Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Because he rolled over to the other side!
Where do you get 30% of your agua? From AGUAfers.
Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
Yo mama is so ugly she's really the reason phone screens cracked!
"I really hate cats," my friend replied with, "You gotta be kitten me!"
What is a room you can not enter?
A mushroom.
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
A guy goes in to get some tests done. The doctor comes out and says, "I got good news and bad news." The guy says, "Ok, let's get the bad news out of the way." The doctor says, "The tests came back positive. You got two weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh My God!! Then what the hell is the good news?" Doctor says "You see that nurse over there, the one with the big tits? I'm screwin' her."
Elephant
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.
If bedbugs live in beds, where do cockroaches live?
Octopus, more like octopussy.
My wife still misses me...
But her aim is getting better!