Worst Jokes Ever
You're so ugly that I choked and died.
Bowling is like child support: it involves balls.
What’s similar between a pregnant 12 year old and the fetus inside of her?
They’re both thinking, “Oh, shit, my mum’s gonna kill me!”
What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don’t care if she has one.
The bell rings, and Ana was about to leave, but the teacher said, "The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do."
The next day, Ana was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late?" Ana replied with, "The bell doesn't tell me when I should arrive, I do."
If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
IBC.
IBC who?
I'll be seeing you later.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?
We have a case of Witzelsucht.
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? Because they don’t get homesick.
Hey Gwen! What is a bean's specialty? Being a jerk!
My sister is so short she can't walk.
What do you call super expensive shoes?
Cashews.
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
A little girl said to her mom, "Mom, my butt's cracked, kiss it, kiss it!" Her mom said, "Sweetie, shut up, it's always been there!" Then her daughter died 'cause of her melodramaticness.
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
What is a cannibal's favorite food?
Finger food.
I made a website about orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
What do you call Peg and Cat from Peg + Cat? Egg + splat.
Eggy joke for all to enjoy!