Worst Jokes Ever
I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but it eventually came back to me.
Why did all the numbers laugh at 22? Because it had "tu tu's."
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
I once auditioned to be in Sausage Party. I thought I filled the role well.
The joke is u.
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not.
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Big tits.
I told a cookie a joke the other day.
It just crumbled.
How do birds pay? With their bills!
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
Stormtrooper: What should I do about my overdue library book?
Palpatine: Renew it!
Wanna hear a long joke?
JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKE!!!!!
I wondered why the baseball was getting closer...
Then it hit me!
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
One day, I put a lady taffy on my ass.