Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because he was tired of waiting for the milk.
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.
The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
China.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
I got detention yesterday because I called the group of emo kids the suicide squad.
Me and a wheelchair person were playing tag, and I broke my leg so it can be fair for him.
I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
Sorry but, no one asked.
Guys, stop making funny jokes of orphans. What, their parents are gonna get mad? Oh wait, continue.
What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have little boy's pants 1⁄2 off...
How do adults like their cookies like their orphans?
Homemade.
NASA stands for "Nobody Already Seen Astronauts."
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
Kobe got irl canceled.
When the C.I.A. raided Osama Bin Laden’s house, they found Steam on his computer. This means he was a gamer. He raged a little too hard and went for New York.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.