Worst Jokes Ever
Hey, watch me eat this African sandwich.
*Takes huge bite of air.*
How do you make a baby cry?
You run over it with a lawn mower.
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not, he got nailed before he died!
How do you tell when a blonde just lost her virginity?
Her crayons are still wet.
You guys asked for a joke? Well, you're in luck, because you already are one!
Why did my boyfriend leave me?
Because he's gay.
But why did he come back to me?
Because I'm actually a guy :-)
What do you call an octopus with a hat?
An octopus with a hat, of course.
Q: Why didn’t Santa eat the milk and cookies you set out for him?
A: He doesn’t exist, you childish sh**!
Why didn't the kid cancer patients like his joke?
He said, "You'll understand when you get older!"
What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
Why were the Twin Towers knocked over? Chuck Norris was leaning on one of them.
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
Mary Rose sat on a pin. Mary Rose!
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
An HDMI cable and an electrical outlet went on a date. It didn't go well, because they couldn't connect.
What do you call dogs dressed as dinosaurs?
Jurassic Bark!