Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

My kids told me to have a good day, so I left them to their own devices and hoped for the best.

"And the Lord said unto John, 'Come forth and receive eternal life,' but John came fifth and got a toaster."

A doctor walks into a room with a dying patient and tells him, "I'm sorry, but you only have 10 left."

The patient asks him, "Ten what, Doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?"

The doctor calmly looks at him and says, "Nine."

The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was flaming hot wings.

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."