Worst Jokes Ever
What's red and sits in the corner?
A baby chewing on a razor blade.
What's green and sits in the corner?
Same baby, one week later.
Guy 2 whispering: Oh, I got tired of acting gay.
Guy 1: I heard you. Why are you acting gay?
Guy 2: To attract gays and then give them advice.
Guy 1: So what's your advice to me?
Guy 2: That I just know you're gay.
LOL xD
Potato.
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
What did Sally get for Easter?..
Nail polish.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They've been making headlines.
School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.
There were three boys on the top of a slide.
The first one went down yelling "gold!" and landed in a pot of gold. The second boy went down and shouted "pillows!" and landed in a heap of pillows. The final boy went down and shouted "weeeeeeeee!"
What do shemales and barns have in common?
Cocks.
What did Spock encounter in the Enterprise toilet?
The Captain's Log.
What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?
"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"
God: (creating elephants) Make it big.
Angel: How big?
God: As big as my d--
Angel: Whoa!
God: Fine, 10 feet tall.
Angel: That's big bu--
God: Put a long thing on its face.
A man is standing on the side of the road, waiting to cross, when another man stands alongside him. The first man says, "I have been waiting to cross here for ages. It's impossible to cross."
The second man says, "There is a zebra crossing up the road." He said, "I hope he is having better luck than I am!"
Communism jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets it.
A clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.
Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack! 🤣😂🤣
A student got a bad letter grade, so the next day he came back with his own letter grade in his backpack: an A-K47.
Old Mother Riley, had a fat cow.
She milked it and milked it but didn't know how, she pulled his tail, pulled his tits. Old Mother Riley was covered in sh!t.