Worst Jokes Ever
What dinosaur loves music?
The velociRAPtor!
Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.
Palpatine: Knew it.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Get in the van, or I'll kill you.
How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Because they found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment!
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?"
The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
Where does a pianist go on vacation?
The Florida Keys.
Taja?
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Some of the best comedians mimic people. I mimic my shadow.
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
A man walks into the taxidermist with two monkeys. The taxidermist asked if he wanted them mounted. The man said, "No. Shaking hands will be fine."
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
A horse walks into a bar.
The barman says...
"Why the long face?"
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms.
Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.
What do crows use when they get a phone?
A "CAWing" card!