Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the ocean wave?
It wanted to say "Hi Tide."
Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?
He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.
You call it turds.
I call it the forbidden chocolate.
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.
Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.
Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"
Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach
I forgot what a boomerang was. Oh well, it’ll come back to me.
Where do fishes keep their money?
In a riverbank.
Been getting a lot of paper cuts on my fingers lately, I guess it's a sign I should go lower.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?
Just hang in there, man.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
When Cincinnati played Alabama in 2021, they wore black at their funeral! 🤣
A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.
She gets home, eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something. Not sure what she said, the girl replies with "ok."
The young teen was gonna head to bed, wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight. She lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say, "Hunny, I'm home." She doesn't bother to say ok.
Later, when she decides to sleep, she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door, that she lost her keys. :)
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it's too cheesy.
Why did the squirrel swim on his back?
To keep his nuts dry.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.