Worst Jokes Ever
What did the blind man say the first time he touched sandpaper?
“What in the world did I just read?”
Why didn’t the emo attend her grandma’s funeral?
She thought her grandma was trying to flex.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
What do you do when you finish a magazine in the hospital?
Reload and keep firing!
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
You pull the pin and throw it back!
What’s the most emo country in the world?
Qatar.
Why was Helen Keller slurring her fingers?
She was drunk.
Whenever I order coffee, I always get the depresso with extra depresso sauce.
What's so special about Palestinian sex dolls?
They blow themselves up.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade once. It killed 300 people.
And then it exploded.
Why are camels known as ships of the desert?
Because they’re full of Arab semen.
I was at a bar. The girl said, "Sex, sex, free sex tonight," when she really said, "663629."
How did the orphan operate the phone? He didn't. He didn't understand the homepage.
I went for a job interview today, and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well, I'm your man," I replied. "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible!"
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."
Me and my girlfriend were walking in the woods.
Her: I am scared!
Me: What do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.