Worst Jokes Ever
What did one alligator say to the other alligator?
"Let’s go for an all-in-one buffet!"
A penis has a sad life.
His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him up!
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice? Nothing, he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"
There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe.
He woke up at night, with a terrible fright, to find out his dream had come true.
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
How do oysters call their friends?
On shell phones!
What is the strongest creature in the sea?
A mussel!
What do cows call money?
Moola.
What happens when a frog parks illegally?
It gets toad.
You are all going to be pun-ished!
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
"Hi, Mrs. Jackson, can Matt come out and play?"
"Oh, Johnny, you know Matt doesn't have any arms or legs."
"I know, we just wanted to use him as third base."
How do blondes play real-life Jenga?
By stacking humans.
What soda do dogs drink? Pupsi.
Why did the fridge have lots of friends?
Cause it was COOL.
Only a genius can say this.
I am stupid.
My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?"
Me: I think it's a great idea, when are you getting one?
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Why are orphans rude at school?
What's the school going to do? Call their parents?