Worst Jokes Ever
Bees don't sting Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris stings bees.
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba na na na.
Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?
Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.
What's the difference between my dad and my stepdad?
My stepdad beat my ass before he left.
What's the difference between Bird flu and swine flu?
For one you get tweetment, for the other you get oinkment.
A Mexican boy said, "I can't do this." Then a guy says, "You can do it, we are Mexican, not Mexicant."
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
9 out of 10 doctors recommend for children to drink water instead of soda. That 1 doctor lives in Flint, Michigan.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
What did the orphan get for Christmas?
Lego figures from his friend, but they ran away too.
Your forehead's so big, it makes Kanye's ego small.
What’s the difference between 911 and an abortion?
With 911 there was a victim to tell the tale.
Why don't dinosaurs lay eggs?
Because they're EGGstinct!
If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.
If a woman gets raped, just walk away, don't bother. Cheer on the rapist if you want.
They believe they are equal to men, right? So they are able to fight back, right? Then prove it! My EQUALITY!
What is common in my AirPods and the Titanic?
They sync properly.
What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?
Ask Boeing.
What is the difference between a whore and an onion?
You don't cry when you chop a whore.
A recent study has found that beer contains female hormones.
A test group of 100 male volunteers each consumed six pints of beer, and the effect was they all talked endlessly about nothing and couldn’t drive for shit.