Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama's so fat that she doesn't need the internet because she is already worldwide.
I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, "Any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer, "Will you please hold my hand?"
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.
Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it.
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
Three men are traveling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while, but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, they suddenly stumble across a tent, and inside are three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny, too, so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince, and these three women were his wives, so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is:
The guy says, "I'm a fireman."
The prince says, "Then we'll burn your dick off!"
The second guy says, "I'm an employee at the shooting range."
The prince says, "Then we'll shoot your dick off!"
The third guy smiles and says, "I'm a lollipop salesman."
What did the Hiroshima survivor say about the day Little Boy dropped? "It was a blast!"
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
What did Hitler say after his parents bought a hauler?
How much did the haulla-cost?
What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. the extra testicle.
What were Steven Hawking's last words?
Error 404 File Not Found.
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.
The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.