Worst Jokes Ever
What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
Why did Trump's brain cross the road?
Oh wait, there is no other side.
Why can’t someone say "ur mums gay" to an orphan? Because he doesn’t have a mum.
You guys are literally mentally ill. You should get some help. This is so disgusting, ew!
What is a tree that does not exist?
A money tree.
"Ur Mater."
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
Cousin: Hey, is that an octopus?
Me: Yes, what, it is just an octopus.
Cousin: Oh yeah, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Octopus touch me!
Me: What, it is just one..... ummmmm dad cousin d[id].
Why don't heterosexual 👨 👨 👨 👨 👨 👨 👨 suck a 🍌 because 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 🍌 tastes like 🐙?
Why do midgets have to wear a green bright jacket when crossing the road?
Because they will get turned into a pancake even more.
It's not funny, I know.
If you argued that God was a woman, 49.8% of the US population would try and raise Hell.
Just to ask the other guy.
Talk about a male supremacist religion.
Me starts a cult just for fun... Just for fun!
Ok, here's a story about the church.
There were two parents, then they had a baby. Then they go to the church and the baby was getting a cross on his forehead. Guess he was big headed. Sorry if this offends anyone or makes this joke bad since I keep writing this.
What are priests' favorite shoe?
White Vans.
My wife's always nagging me. "You don't let me have any friends, I abuse her, and I'm always coming back late." So I thought I would treat her. I popped up in the attic and introduced her to two women.
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your mom told me to follow me.
Orphan: But I don't have a mom!
Why can't Jesus walk on water anymore?
For the same reason a ship won't stay afloat with holes in the bottom.
Me: I call my girl Cinderella.
Friend: Why?
Me: Because she loves balls.
Why don't orphans like pizza? Because they don't have parents, that's why.