Worst Jokes Ever
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
What did the Cheetah say to the Lion?
"I'm a Cheetah!"
My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁
In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
That doesn't matter, we need to get the best joker to go back to posting here, he was funny but now people say they are him and ruin his good name, he was the top of the charts for over a year, so screw all these chumps! Bring back THE REAL SPECIAL!!!
Also, the chicken dies in the end, ha ha, funny, whatever.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and yyyyy night I can drive yyy earth 🌏?
"It's a purple face!" says Yellow Face.
"Oh! Racist!" says Purple Face.
What is the difference when I have my dick in your mouth or when you have yours in mine?
Oh, I forgot, you don't got one, bitches, suck my dick.
Rapist: Rape doesn't hurt anybody.
Victim: (Implied response indicating the rapist is wrong)
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
What do you call a man with no legs?
Hangman.
Your forehead is so big your soulmate didn't even want you.
One time in camp, I kissed my bunkmate Bret in the shower. He cupped my breasts and lathered them in Prell, but I'm totally not gay... :)
Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells."
"Oh, cool."
"This is Mother Teresa’s clock; the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense."
"This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."
"Where’s Trump’s clock?"
"Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had mad flow!
Why did the hip-hop artist always carry a pencil?
For those FREESTYLE DRAFTS!
What do you call a rapper who can't keep a beat?
A RAPPER-TAP-TAP!
How do you know when a rapper's been in the kitchen?
The microwave goes, "ding, ding!"
What did the rapper say to the broken vending machine?
"Yo, drop the BEAT!"
Why did the rapper go to the bank?
To withdraw some flow.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They spit HOT FIRE!