Worst Jokes Ever
What did the plate say to the other plate?
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
What’s black, white, and red all over?
An embarrassed biracial guy.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner.
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.
"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.
Someday you'll go far.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Joe.
Joe who?
Jo Mama!
So Little Johnny saw a robbery, so he tried to stop the robber. To the robber's surprise, he was amazed. So Johnny got 20 shots to the head. The End.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Snow caps!
What do robots 🤖 shave with?
Laser blades!
How do cookies 🍪 give three cheers?
Chip, chip, hooray!
Your favorite music artist is Cardi B? I prefer Cardi A+ if I'm being honest.
You're so fat you probably apply sunscreen with a paint roller.