Worst Jokes Ever
What’s the difference between a dad and a boulder?
About 15 stone.
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.
Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.
Kidnapper: ...
What is a woman doing with an empty sheet?
Reading her rights!
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla?
At least gorillas don't abort their own.
How do you know an orphan is lying? When they swear on their mother's life.
Why don't Indians play soccer?
Because every time they take a corner, they open up a shop.
Why do orphans go to public schools?
Who's going to homeschool them?
What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?
People jumped off a building to escape it.
Morbius was awesome, and the Batman sucked.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were.
Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do Americans call high school?
Shooting range.
Kobe couldn’t clutch up with the rift to go.
Your hairline is lookin' so crusty like KFC chicken and be so discombobulated that it looks like satellite signals. It gives me flippin' sun radiation.
A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion.
"What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, I'm next in line for the Monsignor's job," replied the Priest.
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, next I can become Bishop," said the Priest.
"Yes, and then?" asked the Rabbi.
"If I work real hard and do a good job as Bishop, it's possible for me to become an Archbishop," said the Priest.
"O.K., then what?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest, beginning to get a bit exasperated, replied, "With some luck and real hard work, maybe I can become a Cardinal."
"And then?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest is really starting to get mad now and replies, "With lots and lots of luck and some real difficult work and if I'm in the right places at the right times and play my political games just right, maybe, just maybe, I can get elected Pope."
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Good grief!" shouted the Priest. "What do you expect me to become, GOD?"
"Well," said the Rabbi, "One of our boys made it!"
What types of erections do skeletons have? Boners.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Yo mama so fat they faked COVID-19 just to put a mask on her.
You know why women wear tampons?
So the crabs could bungee jump!
When younger girls say, "I want my period, or it will not be bad."
*eating chocolate in bed crying* My face at them when they say that. 🤣🙄😵
Them: "I got my period." *them hurting*. Me: "Told ya."
Why can orphans get away with robbing the bank?
Because no one wants him.