Worst Jokes Ever

Mom: Son, get up for school.

Son: I AM UP *holds up books and says I'm up* IM UP MOM!

Q: Why is the graveyard so noisy? A: Because all the coffin.

If you don't get it, it means because of people coughing.

Knock knock.

Who's there? It's the Grim Reaper.

Grim Reaper who?

The Grim Reaper who is about to come in your house, smoke some weed, drink some Grim Reaper liquor, and then get drunk.

Why can’t an orphan have a dog? It always runs away.

Why can’t orphans go on field trips?

Because they need a parent’s signature.

Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today and tomorrow. I have to go home from home and walk home. Walk and a bike. Walk, walk, and a bike to school tomorrow night. I have to have lunch with my mom and dad, and I have dinner with you tonight.

Perrie.

What is the difference between onions and babies?

I cry when I cut onions.

What school did we say it was today? What did the snow say? "I love!"

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because they can't find home! 😂🤣

What’s the best part about raping a blind girl? She’ll never see you coming.

Dwarf Shortage.

Why do I call my priest daddy?

Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.

What did one nut say to the other nut?

A: "Candice deez nuts fit in my mouth."

Corona be like:

Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.

*snap*

What's an Asian orphan's surname? No Pham.

I named my dog Chicken.

I love eating chicken.

This man came up to me and asked if I could sell my house to him, and I said sure. Then five days later, he said that the loan should come in the mailbox. Then I checked the mailbox, and the only thing I saw was nothing, so I told the guy, "DEEZ NUTS IN YOUR MOUTH!"

Why do Catholic Irishmen in Ireland have a glory hole in the men's restroom inside their restaurants so they can give Irish kisses on Saint Patrick's Day?

Life is too short, just like me. Get roasted, short people!