Worst Jokes Ever
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?
I don’t put fruit in a blender.
Ran out of toilet paper, so had to start using lettuce leaves... today was the tip of the iceberg.
I'm gonna jump to my death.
Don't worry. I won't jump far.
Just off this chair here...
Why do orphans play GTA? Because they want to feel wanted.
A boy and a girl are showering together. The girl looks down and says to the boy, "Hey, can I touch it?" The boy replies, "Oh hell nah. You already ripped yours off."
How do you get away with rape and incest in California?
Say you identify as a woman. Fact: It's actually legal to rape your daughter if you are a woman in California.
What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.
What do you call a family photo taken by an orphan?
A selfie.
What is gay - curious 🤔 😳
👬 👬 a gay man that is curious about experiencing sex with a 👨 👩 👨 bisexual man.
👨 👨 👩 🚲 🚲 🚲 does it cycle now?
🚲 🚲 🚲
😢 😔 sorry for your luck 🍯 honey it sucks 😪 😞 😒 to be you.
I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.
When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"
I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."
The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.
You know if you go to Wal-Mart, and go to the milk section, you might just find your dads.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
If a heterosexual man wanted his dick sucked, what would a feminist say to him that a gay man would never say to him?
"Not now, I have a headache."
If you kill an orphan, would that count as a squad wipe?
What do you call a born-again heteroflexible male that is a Christian nationalist who thinks he is bisexual when the LGBT community knows that he is bicurious and that he is on steroids and that the LGBT community knows that he is not telling the truth about that? He is a gay man that is in the closet. He should be forced out of the closet by gay men in the LGBT community by any means necessary if gay men in the LGBT community still want to defend the wall of separation of church and state by any means necessary.
So, a blind guy is sitting on a park bench with his seeing eye dog right beside him. Suddenly, his seeing eye dog cocks his leg and pisses all over the blind guy's leg. So the blind guy gives the dog a treat.
A man taking a walk saw the entire thing and said to the blind man, "That is the most charitable thing I’ve ever seen, your dog deliberately pissed on you and here you are giving him a dog biscuit." The blind man says, "Oh it’s not what you think, I’m just trying to find his head so I can kick him in the ass."
What does the 'w' in Africa stand for? Water.
What is the most common crime in China?
Identity fraud.
What’s the difference between Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker?
They both died at 95.