Worst Jokes Ever

My therapist said time heals all wounds. I stabbed him. Now we wait...

Why did the orphan go to a church?

So he could call someone "father."

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Not your dad?"

I like porn a lot. I was wondering if you guys can talk to me.

What does Jesus do when he gets nervous? He bites his nails.

I have tried coke; it is not my cup of tea.

Why does every emo kid try to be like Tarzan? So they can swing on the vine.

How do you clean the ocean?

With tide!

Where do orphans have their family reunions?

The graveyard.

A 10 year old girl lays in her bed and excitedly waits for Santa to come. When Santa eventually comes she giggles, shivers, and orgasms.

Finally, as a special thank you, she sucks off Santa’s wet cock.

He wasn't that bad.

A) Why don't orphans play Minecraft Online?

Q) Because Technoblade will get their I.P. address and cum to their houses!

Bully: You're a loser and fat.

Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.

What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.

Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.

They say people are 75% water.

But I’m 75% an orphan and 25% useless.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they can’t find home.

Stephen Hawking died.

I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging.

What do orphans do after they win a game?

Nothing, they have no one to play games with.

POV them: What's one move to get a man motivated in bed?

Her: All you gotta give is that hawk tuah and spit on that thang, you get me?