Worst Jokes Ever
What is an orphan's favorite song?
"Home."
Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning? because they don't have balls to scratch.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
These jokes are a little too explosive, if you ask me.
Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"
The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."
When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.
Me: You f&*k up.
The class: Oh sh!&
Short girl: "How do you see up there?"
Tall guy: "Who said that?"
I spit my drink out and then ran away.
What's the worst thing you can say to a widow?
"I'm sorry, I just had to."
When you think you're depressed, but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self-loathing, but then you realize that it, in itself, might actually be a symptom of depression.
Well gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands!
If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?
None of them. Immigration service is.
My dad said people shouldnβt get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.
So I took down his confederate flag.
Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"
"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Fatherβs or Motherβs Day.
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
How did the guys with Down syndrome split the dinner bill? They all made a down payment.
The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
Everybody asks, "What's up?" but nobody asks, "What's down?"
Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.