A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.
The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?
What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
The truth behind Hitler's suicide: his gas bill was too high.
Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.
A riddle: My enemy is the Joker, I'm black and I help to save Gotham City. Who am I?
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A money manager who counts bars.
Why was the rapper always calm during a storm?
Because he knew how to RIDE THE FLOW.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his FLOW-CABULARY!
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some WAVES.
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
Why was the rapper so good at math?
Because he knew how to count his bars!
What's the difference between your dad and grocery shopping?
He didn't come back with the milk.
Daveon says, "Oh wow, she's so beautiful!" The doctor then says, "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states, "Give me the one my wife made then!"
Yo mama is so dumb, she spent all her money on free subscriptions!
Yo mama is so clumsy, when she had her first kickboxing lesson, she kicked herself in the testicles.
The Twilight fanbase.
So you're offended by midget jokes? C'mon, grow up!