I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Bro, the US keeps bullying the UK because the queen died, and do you know the meme "No Bitches?" Yeah, they put "No Queen" instead. And guess what? The UK replied this time and said, "No Towers?" I was shocked. UK's most devious lick.
A guy and his girl just finished making love.
Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"
The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"
Jack and Jill wanted some pills.
So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.
Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."
This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.
This pun is so bad you're gonna punch me.
Windows could not connect to the Internet, would you like to search online for a solution to this problem?
What did the kamikaze instructor say to the students?
"Okay guys, watch very carefully because I can only show you this demonstration once."
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
This orphan showed me a family photo.
But it was just a selfie.
Like this post and comment down below if you want me to announce my real name in my next post!
Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
Hello Watersharky, I am Koge.
I see your songs and want to be your agent. Please write back about this offer. Thank you.
I don’t struggle with depression, at this point I’ve got it down. I’m good at depression.
How can you tell a Pokémon likes baseball?
Every night he turns into a Golbat.
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?
