Think jokes
Do you think the ocean is salty because the beach never waves back?
What did one droplet say to the other?
"Water you thinking?"
I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!
People so dumb they think they're "transblind" like WTF, idiots!
So I'm a cow, guess what my dad thinks of that? He says I'm a loooosmer.
I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
A girl comes up to her dad and says, "Can I borrow the car tonight? I want to go to this party." Dad says, "If you give a head job..." The girl says, "You're my dad! How can you say that?" Dad says, "If you want the car..." The girl thinks, "Okay." She starts. Dad says, "That tastes like sh*t." Dad: "Yeah, your brother wanted the car this morning."
Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.
Sans: I am doing something.
Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?
Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.
Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.
Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.
Caesar went to the future only to see how the Romans forgot Julius Caesar but only made a salad... I think it would have been better if Caesar stayed dead.
I think I might apply for a job cleaning mirrors.
It’s a job I can see myself doing.
Q: You have problems, I think your disease is BOOFA.
Q: What boofa?
A: Boofa deez nuts in yo mouth!
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
My friend thinks he is funny.
He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion, so I threw a coconut at him.
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.
They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You think violets are blue, what the hell is wrong with you?
What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?
Ask Boeing.
Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?
I think it got lockjaw after that.
This isn't a joke, just an American back-to-school list.
1. Pencils
2. Binders
3. Paper
4. Pencil sharpener.
What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?
Roses are red.
Grass is green.
I think of you sucking my peen.