So a blind guy is sitting on a park bench his seeing eye dog right beside him. Suddenly his seeing eye dog cocks his leg and pisses all over the blind guys leg. So the blind guy gives the dog a treat. A man taking a walk saw the entire thing and said to the blind man. That is the most charitable thing I’ve ever seen, your dog deliberately pissed on you and here you are giving him a dog biscuit. The blind man says Oh it’s not what you think I’m just trying to find his head so I can kick him in the Ass.
When your uncle drops a nickel but the only thing he really drops is his pants
Throw a plate.. It’s broken right?.. Say “sorry” to it.. Did it fix back?.. No..that’s the Same thing you did to me:)
When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It's the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.
What are three things you can't give a black guy?
A fat lip, a black eye, and a job
Jesus loves you" is a wonderful thing to hear in church.
But a horrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison.
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read? The waffle iron.
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas. Because their dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
Why is a blind people bad at catching things because they never see it coming
The tables Im my class are strait but I can’t say the same thing for you’re hairline
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW? Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common. My sister tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing? Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
My grandmother made her passage on a boat the thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
What a upside to being an orphan There's things called family size bags
your so poor if ever broke into your house id give you things
Hey girl are you a scientist?
Cause you made my thing into a baking soda volcano
