Orphan's and homeless people people are the same thing.
when you send ur girl a dick pic but she says its small. so you text back and say: "enjoy the little things".
the sad thing is when they ride the scooters in wal mart.....really you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with.....and damned if they arent buying diet soda.....please....cull this shit...we dont need them in society...kfc is not a disease
Leo must be a PARKING TICKET... not because of the “fine” thing, nah, it’s because she’s OVERSTAYED her WELCOME
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the care outside a pregnancy care center? A. Having to go inside and ask for a coathanger.
Bro your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common they look like Humpty Dumpty.
what's one thing you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend? I wish it were this color, why is it leaking there, I need help trimming the grass I mean bushes, I own it.
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
Okay what do you call that purple thing your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend so for some weird reason? Dad better look out from Bob battery operated boyfriend hahaha
I was watching The Perfect Murder with my boyfriend it was a good movie but the weird thing was that my boyfriend was taking notes through out the whole movie
Se this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I be the first person to say drinks are on me
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!”, so I started doing the same to them at funerals.
The only thing colder than Siberia is my girlfriends ex!
What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.
What is the same thing between water and dark jokes?
Not everyone gets it!
MU i love your joke but i cut me a piece of cake, pie, steak, cheeze cake, and any thing else i can find.
Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?
Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down
Tell it to ur parents and friends
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince? The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Your hairline so far back I use it as a ruler to measure things
Whats the only thing that doesn't change in Alabama
The last names after marriage
