Things

Things jokes

Twin Towers

Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?

Friend: What?

Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.

Fat

You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.

Palestine

People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.

The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."

WW2

What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?

Memes

Class

I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes

A yellow minion with one eye and blue overalls stands on the left. To the right, there is a text that begins: "What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals..." and continues with a long, aggressive monologue.

Orphanage

What is the only thing worse than being told you're adopted?

Still being in the orphanage at 13.

Plane

My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.

Soldier

Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.

Hangout

I done a thing where we have chat hangouts with people that like Gwen or just want to hang out, do stuff.

All people are invited!

We have a lot! Enjoy!

Covid

The CCP should be pleased. COVID is the longest thing to have ever been made in China.

Gwen

Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?

Dad

What's one thing you'll never find in lost and found?

Your dad.

Age

Chenle: One time when I was younger, someone asked me how old I was and I forgot. I had to Wikipedia my age to remember.

Jisung: This is the richest thing I've ever heard in my life.

Discord server

Knock knock.

Who's there? Discord server.

Discord server who?

This server is dead, bye bitches, I got better things to do than watch you sit here and type like a sloth.

Death

What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?

The HIV test results.

Suicide

Guys, I promise I’m not suicidal, I just like dark things.

*proceeds to walk around the house with headphones in and stare at the ceiling while laying down on the couch*

Girl

What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?

They can’t say no.

Seafood

What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?

I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!

Politician

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.

They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

Dinner

What’s one thing you can say during family dinner and in bed?

"Will there be seconds?"